10.24考雅思 帮忙看看这篇作文能打几分

问题描述:

10.24考雅思 帮忙看看这篇作文能打几分
当今社会家庭成员之间的沟通越来越少,Do you agree or disagree
In contemporary society,the tempo of life goes faster,and pressures come with the fast life,support from families is indispensable for everyone,but someone would argue with this.The situation may be just opposite.
The pace of modern life is increasing rapidly,home seems to be the last and only place where pressures can not reach.People want to have a comfortable chat with family members,complain the busy day theu have had,and hope families could support them behind their back.Families should help them to release,listen to the complain,basically,have a good time with others.In ideal situation,there will be a harmony family,but the truth sometime goes to another way.
In fact,all family members want to be supported by others,but seldom
are really suppotive.In China most parents of families are both have to work,and they all have their own problems.When no one want to be listener,there is always conflicts,the best way to avoid this kind of conflict,they always choose,is not to communicate each other.And the pressures do not come from outside world only,some of these come from family.Parents hope their child to be better and work hard when the youth want to have a break after all school stuff,a husband want to watch a football game after a really long day while his wife,also had a tough day,need his help to do some household chores,communication does not go well,and always,after a bad communication,there is no communication.
To sum up,we are truely not communicate with family members too much noeadays,we want to,but we do not handle it well.
我是新人,能给的分不多,请大家多包涵

觉得你的观点写的不错
但是语法和措辞很值得推敲
分数应该是在5.5-6分之间
但是如果单词和句子之间能够润色和修改下的
到6.5-7也是有可能的