英语高手们帮我看一下这一段英文有没有错误呀!

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英语高手们帮我看一下这一段英文有没有错误呀!
This is the beginning of a new day.God has given me this day to use as I will.I can waste it - or use it for good,but what I do today is important,because I am exchanging a day of my life for it!When tomorrow comes,this day will be gone forever,leaving in its place something that I have traded for it.I want it to be gain,and not lose.Good,and not evil; Success,and not failure,in order that I shall not regret the price that I have paid for it.
这是新的一天的开始,上帝已将这一天恩赐于我,让我按照自己的意愿来利用它.我可以浪费它--也可以很好地利用它,但真正重要的是我今天的所作所为,因为我正在用我生命中的一天与之交换!当明天来临,这一天将永远消逝,留给这一天的是我们付出后换来的收获.我希望这一天有所得而无所失,美好幸福而无灾祸,取得成功而不失败,这样我就不会后悔我为它付出的代价.

AS I WILL 应该改为IT FOLLOWS MY WAYUSE IT FOR GOOD 改为 USE IT WELLWHAT I DO 改为 WHAT I WILL DOTHIS DAY WILL BE GONE 改为 THIS DAY WILL LEAVE ME AWAYLEAVING IN TIS PLACE SOMETHING THAT I HAVE TREDED ...