请帮忙修改一篇英语文章怕大家看不下去,就分开打了,写的不好,请不要嘲笑.麻烦大家能帮我加些词汇什么的使文章语句完美些.这是下篇:I am not outgoing,so it was easy for me to bear lonely.But now,there is about 2410 kilometers from my home to this university.For me,far away from my home means I have to bear loney and take care of myself.All these things have to be done just on my own.Everytime I see the moon,of course I tried my best to aviod to see it,the feeling of missing my family and friends comes back to me again
请帮忙修改一篇英语文章
怕大家看不下去,就分开打了,写的不好,请不要嘲笑.麻烦大家能帮我加些词汇什么的使文章语句完美些.
这是下篇:
I am not outgoing,so it was easy for me to bear lonely.But now,there is about 2410 kilometers from my home to this university.For me,far away from my home means I have to bear loney and take care of myself.All these things have to be done just on my own.
Everytime I see the moon,of course I tried my best to aviod to see it,the feeling of missing my family and friends comes back to me again.
I keep in touch with all my friends,I did not have enough courage to tell them that I miss them,I just said some funny things which happened here to cover my real feelings.
Looking at the moon,missing my family and friends,crying stealthily,does these things have to full of my life when I far away from my home?
bear lonely改为LONELINESS
there is 改为IT IS
far away 前面加个BEING
means 后面加个THAT
I keep in touch with all my friends,I did not have enough courage to tell them 中的“,”改为“。”
have to full of 的TO后面加个BE
I far away 的I后面加个AM
总得来说还不错,只是太中式了些。建议多作阅读
简洁易懂。不必加修饰了。
I am not outgoing,so it was easy for me to bear loneliness.And the distance between my home and this university,which is 2410 kilometers,makes the situation(it) even worse.For me,being far away from home means I have to bear the loneliness and take care of myself.All these things have to be done just on my own.Everytime I see the moon and try desperately not to miss home and friends,the feeling of this keeps haunting me.(我说,把想家翻来覆去说这么多遍有意义么?既然是想家,统一在一个分段里比较好)
I am still in touch with all my friends,but I do not have enough courage to tell them that I miss them.During the call,I just said something funny which happened here to cover my real feelings.
Looking at the moon,missing my family and friends and crying stealthily,do these things have to fill my life when being far away from home?
真情实感倒是有,但是意境没有表达到位.如楼上所言,太中式了.
最后一句,Do these things have to fill my life up when I am so far away from my home?