幽默英语小短文60词左右,带翻译.

The doctor lives downstairs
　　"Doctor," she said loudly,bouncing into the room,"I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."
　　He surveyed her from head to foot."Madam," he said at length,"I've just three things to tell you.First,your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds.Second,your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick.And third,I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."
医生住在楼下
　　“医生”她冲进屋后大声说道.
　　“我想让你坦率地说我到底得了什么病.”
　　他从头到脚打量打量她,然后大声说：“太太,我有三件事要对你说.第一,您的体重需要减少大约50磅；第二,如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口红,您的美貌将会改变.第三,我是一位画家——医生住在楼下.”
Only cash and credit cards
When a man called a motel and asked how much they charged for
　　a room,the clerk told him that the rates depend on room size and number of people.
" Do you take children?" the man asked.
"No,sir," replied the clerk."Only cash and credit cards."
只算现金和信用卡
一个人打电话给一家汽车旅馆询问房租,旅馆的工作人员回答说 房租的多少取决于房间的大小和住客的人数.
“小孩儿算不算呢?”那人问道.
“不算,先生.”服务员回答,“我们只算现金和信用卡.”