请问有没有语法和结构错误呢?Due to I wanted to have a more charming shape,I have kept fit for a month when I just graduated from my high school.At the first week,I did some exercises through some facilities in the gym and that was memorial.Neverthelss,I couldn't change ,so I wanted to refund.However,the women who worked at the reception refused my quest though I was so awkward.They estimated that I just didn't spended enough time to do the physical exercises and if
请问有没有语法和结构错误呢?
Due to I wanted to have a more charming shape,I have kept fit for a month when I just graduated from my high school.At the first week,I did some exercises through some facilities in the gym and that was memorial.Neverthelss,I couldn't change ,so I wanted to refund.However,the women who worked at the reception refused my quest though I was so awkward.They estimated that I just didn't spended enough time to do the physical exercises and if I want to refund ,they could only refund me half of my money.
As a result,I accepted their opinions.I was back to the gym and used some proper tools which was suitable for me.I also stopped eating any refreshments so that I became more slim after a month.Because my oil was eliminated.
直接 graduated from high school.不要加介词，不然有种中文直接翻译过来的chinglish的感觉
that was memorial,改成impressive。还有连词用太多了反而很累赘
1.due to很别扭,because这种简单的就很好.
2.did exercise不要加s
3.不是through some facilities,可以改成with或者using
4.that was memorial不知道楼主你想表达什么意思,memorial一般指怀念死人
5.refund是别人还给你钱,用get my money back简单方便~
6.However和though不连用
7.They thought that i just did not spend enough money in their gym and if i want to get some money back.
8.as a result用at last更好一些...
9.opinion用solution更好,因为是这个问题的解决办法嘛
10.i was back改成i went back更好
11.tools还是用equipment更好,前面那个facilities也是一样
12.and used some proper equipment which were more suitable for me
13.refreshment是指那些别人提供的小点心之类的,吃了让你提神（比如航班晚点的时候给你吃的零食,送的饮料.或者长途飞机上给你送的小点心）此处用snack
14.slimmer不是 more slim
15.最后一句改为：because i reduce my fat intake.（减少了油脂摄入量）
另外如果露珠你是要打印出来或是寄email或者任何电子版的文档,每个标点后都是要空一格才能打下一个单词的哦!
希望对你有所帮助,不对的地方还请多指正.