小弟初学英语特别是作文不太好 请各位大虾帮我改改作文以后小弟一个礼拜这时候写一篇,主要帮我改改语法3Q

小弟初学英语特别是作文不太好 请各位大虾帮我改改作文以后小弟一个礼拜这时候写一篇,主要帮我改改语法3Q
这是一篇关于有关学生是否应该带手手机上学的文章写给报社编辑
Dear Editor:
with the development of the science and technology mobile phone is becoming more and more popular and now most of the customers are students but " every coin has its two sides " not only the mobile phone bring us convenience and fun but also its bring us some problems .In school some students thought that they use mobile phone only to contactwith their parents and classmates easier and also it is fashionable but the teacher thought the students are not able to control themselves some of them enjoy nothing except mobile phone games is they want to contact with anyone else they can use the public phone in the school
In my opinion,it is uncessary to the students to bring mobile phone to go to school they can use it after school .even if they want to bring it to go to school ,he must let it off till class over
Mobile phone isn't your friend .it is a machine forever without mobile phone .you can do yourself much more better
主要帮我改改语法 还有 满分15帮我打个分吧~