请高手修改并评价这篇4级作文,For this part,you are allowed 30minutes to write a short essay entitled Recreational Activities.You shoul write at least 120 words following the outline given below.1娱乐活动多种多样2娱乐活动可以使人们受益,也可能带来危害3作为大学生,我认为.Recreational ActivitiesIn colleges,especially in Chinese colleges,students get freedom from the more fraternal,more relaxing,and more harmonious atmosphere.In their spare time,lots of recreational activities are available.For instance,

请高手修改并评价这篇4级作文,
For this part,you are allowed 30minutes to write a short essay entitled Recreational Activities.You shoul write at least 120 words following the outline given below.
1娱乐活动多种多样
2娱乐活动可以使人们受益,也可能带来危害
3作为大学生,我认为.
Recreational Activities
In colleges,especially in Chinese colleges,students get freedom from the more fraternal,more relaxing,and more harmonious atmosphere.In their spare time,lots of recreational activities are available.For instance,sports,club activities,computer games,trips are all students' favorite activities.
However,when we find out some advantages about recreational activities,I reckon that there are some disadvantages about recreational activities as well.To begin with,playing computer games do a lot of harm to students.Independent as they are,teachers and parents cannot intervene profoundly in their daily life,which will result in students' lack of concentration on their study.Subsequently,many club activities seem to be a waste of time.Many activities just focus on getting together and going ouside the campus to have a meal.Scarcely can they make progress from this kind of activities.Moreover,going on a trip to somewhere else is a good idea,but who guarantees the safety of the students as quite a few cases show that students in campus are more liable to have an accident while going on a trip.
As a college student,I think that we should consider the problem in a provident way.Recreational activities can just be used for relaxation out of study time,but not to be addicted to them and not to abuse them.