雅思作文求高手批改打分Topic:as for elderly,living in caring house is better than living at home with young children.Present your argument to illustrate whether you agree or disagree.Of these issues that have sparked public interests,the topic about where elder people live,a caring house or their own family with children is one of the most prominent.In this text,I’m a proponent of the opinion that living in a caring house is much more beneficial for old person.In

问题描述:

雅思作文求高手批改打分
Topic:as for elderly,living in caring house is better than living at home with young children.Present your argument to illustrate whether you agree or disagree.
Of these issues that have sparked public interests,the topic about where elder people live,a caring house or their own family with children is one of the most prominent.In this text,I’m a proponent of the opinion that living in a caring house is much more beneficial for old person.In this essay,I’m going to list three reasons to back up my point.
Physically speaking,a caring house is of great merits.The workers there,such as nurse and doctors,are filled with professional skills.Rather speaking,by accepting sensitive guides,the elder can live a better life,with which their children could focus on their own business.Notably,there is no dearth of telling examples in this regard.America is a conspicuous one.Since America has a large mount of caring houses,a wealth of young people tend to send their parents to there ,which contributes a lot to young people’s business and finance.At the same time,the parents who have a balanced diet and do exercises regularly enjoy a stably health life.
Apart from the physical benefits,caring house exert positive effects on old people’s psychology.Owing to caring houses,old person could have a private place to communicate together,to recall together ,to share life experience together,upgrading their sense of happiness.
Admittedly,many people ,especially many experts,point out that leaving elder people at a caring house is harmful to the family’s relationship.Nevertheless,if we take a closer look,we will find that it is rewarding.Rather speaking,leaving elders alone at home instead just make them more helpless.
To recap,I’m in favor of argument that living in a caring house could reap golden chance to receive superb old-ages.

good

(Of these issues)?-what issues?its incomplete
that have sparked public interests,the topic about where elder people (should) live,a caring house or their own family with children is one of the most prominent (matter).In this text,I’m a proponent of the opinion that living in a caring house is much more beneficial for old (people).In this essay,I’m going to list three reasons to back up my point.
(Theoretically) speaking,a caring house is of great (merit).(Workers) such as (nurses) and doctors () are (professionally skilled),by (receiving) sensitive guides,the (elders) can live a better life (whereas) their children could focus on their own (businesses).Notably,there is no dearth of (producing) examples in this regard(,) America is a conspicuous one(,) since (there is) a large mount of caring houses,(numerous) young people tend to send their parents to there ,which (reduces family obligations to )a lot of young people.
(At the same time,the parents who have a balanced diet and do exercises regularly enjoy a stably health life.)- i do not understand the point of this sentence in this article
Apart from the physical benefits,caring house exert positive effects on old people’s psychology.Owing to caring houses,old person could have a private place to communicate together,to recall together ,to share life experience together,upgrading their sense of happiness.
Admittedly,many people ()especially (the) experts,point out that leaving elder people (in) a caring house is harmful to the family’s relationship.Nevertheless,if we take a closer look() we will find that it is rewarding.- what is rewarding?i do not get it
Rather speaking,-what is rather speaking?better change it
leaving elders alone at home (would) just make them more helpless.
To recap,-
I’m in favor of (the)argument that living in a caring house could reap golden chance to receive superb old-ages.
楼主英文结构很特殊,用词需要注意,有很多地方因为用词错误我都不知道是想要表达什么.有些句子不完整,没有把意思表达清楚,而且不要一开头就用一个字开始(eg admittedly)