我需要两篇英语趣味故事,要比较长的,100多字以上的,帮帮我,尽量快点,谢谢

odd experience

Two pals are sitting in a pub watching the eleven-'clock news.A reporter comes on about a man threatening to jump from the 20th floor of a downtown building.One friend turns to the other and says,'I'll bet you ten bucks the guy doesn't jump.'
'It's a bet,' agrees his buddy.
A few minutes later, the man on the ledge jumps,so the loser hands his pal a $10 bill.'I can't take your money,'his friend admits.'I saw him jump earlier on the six-o'clock news.'
'Me,too,'says the other buddy.'But I didn't think he'd do it again.
两个好朋友正坐在一家小酒馆内观看十一点的电视新闻。一则新闻报道说，有个男人威胁要从商业区一座大楼的二十层跳下去。一位朋友转身对另一位说道：“我敢赌十块钱，那家伙不会往下跳。”
“赌就赌，”他的朋友欣然同意。
几分钟后，站在墙檐上的男人跳了下去，因而赌输的那位交给他的朋友一张十元的钞票。“我不能拿你的钱，”他的朋友承认道，“早在六点的新闻里，我就已见他跳下去了。”
“我也是，”另一位说，“可我想他不会再跳了！”
The Old Cat
An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.
Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."
【译文】
老猫
一位老妇有只猫，这只猫很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了东西，因为它年纪太大了。一天，老猫发现一只老鼠，它跳过去抓这只老鼠，然而，它咬不住这只老鼠。因此，老鼠从它的嘴边溜掉了，因为老猫咬不了它。
于是，老妇很生气，因为老猫没有把老鼠咬死。她开始打这只猫，猫说：“不要打你的老仆人，我已经为你服务了很多年，而且还愿意为你效劳，但是，我实在太老了，对年纪大的不要这么无情，要记住老年人在年青时所做过的有益的事情。”

Once upon a time there was a clever,wily peasant,whose tricks could be much talked about.The best story,however,is how he once got the best of the devil and made a fool of him.One day the peasant had been working in his field,and just as it was getting dark he was getting ready to go home when in the middle of his field he saw a pile of burning coals.Filled with amazement he walked toward it,and sitting on the top of the glowing coals there was a little black devil.
"You must be sitting on a treasure," said the peasant.
"Yes indeed," replied the devil,"on a treasure that contains more gold and silver than you have ever seen in your life."
"The treasure is in my field and belongs to me," said the peasant.
"It is yours," answered the devil,"if for two years you will give me one half of everything your field produces.I have enough money,but I have a desire for the fruits of the earth."
The peasant entered into the bargain,saying,"To prevent any dispute from arising about the division,everything above the ground shall belong to you,and everything beneath the ground to me."
The devil was quite satisfied with that,but the cunning peasant had planted turnips.
Now when harvest time came the devil appeared and wanted to take away his crop,but he found nothing except the yellow withered leaves,and the happy peasant dug up his turnips.
"You got the best of me this time," said the devil,"but it won't happen again.Next time what grows above ground shall be yours,and what is under it shall be mine."
"That is all right with me," answered the peasant.When planting time came the peasant did not plant turnips again,but wheat.The crop ripened,and the peasant went into the field and cut the full stalks off at ground level.When the devil came he found nothing but the stubble,and he angrily disappeared into a chasm in a cliff.
"That's the way one has to deal with foxes," said the peasant,then carried away the treasure.
从前有位远见卓识、机智聪明的农夫,有关他足智多谋的故事至今人们仍广为传颂.其中最精彩的要首推他曾经怎样捉弄魔鬼的故事.
一天,农夫在田间劳动了一整天,天黑时正准备回家,忽然发现自己的田里有堆煤在燃烧,他惊讶万分,於是便走上前去看,发现竟有一个黑色的小魔鬼走在燃烧的煤堆上.“你是坐在财宝上吗?”农夫问.“正是财宝.”魔鬼答道,“而且比你一生见到的都要多呢!”“财宝在我田里就得归我.”农夫说道.“就归你吧!”魔鬼说,“只要你肯将两年内一半的收成给我就行了.钱,我有的是,但我更喜欢地上的果实.”农夫答应了这桩交易,并说：“为了避免在我们分配时出现纠纷,凡泥土上的东西归你,泥土下的归我.”魔鬼感到心满意足,但这位聪明的农夫却种上了萝卜.
现在收获的季节到了,魔鬼又来了,要求收回属於他的收成.但除了那些枯黄的败叶外,他一无所获；而农夫却在兴高采烈地挖着他的萝卜.“这次让你占了便宜,”魔鬼说,“下次可不能这样.地上的归你,地下的归我.”“悉听尊便.”农夫答道.播种的季节又到了,这次他可不播萝卜,而是种上了小麦.麦子熟了,他来到田间,把麦秆齐根割倒在地.魔鬼又来了,见到除了残茬外,他又一无所获,气得转身就走,顺着石缝钻了进去.“我就是这样骗倒魔鬼的.”农夫说完,赶紧拾起财宝回家去了.