英语作文,帮我看看有没有语法错误和用词不当的,以及怎样修改,非常非常感谢,一鞠躬:)

问题描述:

英语作文,帮我看看有没有语法错误和用词不当的,以及怎样修改,非常非常感谢,一鞠躬:)
As is vividly demonstrated in the picture above,a football match is going on.On guarding the goal,the man on left seems to be keeping a “huge goal” that is easy and inevitable for a goal,while the person on the right hesitates to kick the ball with an illusion about the “huge goalkeeper”.It is obvious that both of them exaggerate the difficulties in front of them.What is conveyed in the picture reflects a phenomenon and is most thought-provoking.
The main purpose of the painter can be interpreted in terms of the sense of confidence must be cultivated.To begin with,the spirit of challenge is missing among the general public for the time being.The young always give up because the problem is beyond their ability to cope with.Superficially,it seems to bee somewhat reasonable,but when weighing in the mind,we find there is an apparent tendency underlying this phenomenon:the lack of confidence.What’s more,there is no doubt that confidence is as important as other factors contributing to one’s success.Without confidence,we may undergo repeated failures in whatever we do.I can think of no better illustration than the following one.Helen Keller was born deaf,dumb and blind,certainly nothing to give her self-confidence.Nevertheless,she went on to conquer her multiple handicaps to finally become a writer and lecture,to become an inspiration to all.
Accordingly,on no account can we ignore the significance of confidence.We should spare no effort to build our confidence in order to properly meet these unavoidable life challenges.Only in this way can we achieve great success in the competitive world.

As is vividly depicted in the picture above,a football match is going on.On guarding the goal,the man on the left tries hard to keep the goal as if he is completing 'Mission Impossible'; while the person on the right hesitates to kick the ball with a false impression of the “huge goal keeper”.It is obvious that both of them exaggerate the difficulties confronting them.The message conveyed by the picture is phenomenal and thought-provoking.
The composer's main purpose can be interpreted as:the sense of confidence must be cultivated.To begin with,the spirit of challenge is missing among the general public for the time being.Young people tend to give up because the problem is beyond their ability to cope with.It seems to be somewhat reasonable under the first glance; but when we contemplate it more deeply,there is an underlying cause to this phenomenon:the lack of confidence.What’s more,there is no doubt that confidence is as important as other factors contributing to one’s success.Without confidence,we may undergo repeated failures no matter what we do.I can think of no fitter example than the following one.Helen Keller was born deaf,[dumb (dumb!she is not dumb!please delete this word)] and blind,certainly her physical disability should have suppressed her self-confidence.Nevertheless,she conquered her disabilities and finally became a writer,a lecturer,and a great inspiration to all of us.
Accordingly,on no account can we ignore the significance of confidence.We should spare no effort to build our confidence in order to overcome these inevitable life challenges.Only in this way can we achieve great success in the competitive world.
写的很好啊!尤其是最后一段.我就小改了改.只有海伦那段雷着我了 - 海伦不是弱智啊,不过是失明失聪,然后导致后来连声音都发不出来了而已.