修改一篇英文小作文,是一篇很短的英语演讲稿

问题描述:

修改一篇英文小作文,是一篇很短的英语演讲稿
因为需要一篇很短的英语演讲稿,我就搜索了一篇,但是好像有问题,很多地方读不通,不知道是原本就有问题还是我的水平有限判断错误.
如能指出错误并改正者,可以继续加高分.
认真修改者奖励200分
Ladies and Gentlemen,Good afternoon!
As we all know,in 2008 Beijing Olympic Games will be held,every person are eagerly looking forward to its arrival,carefully exploring the life of the details,we can easily see that the Olympic spirit is everywhere.
Between neighbors,we help each other; colleagues,in addition to competition,everyone has even more made on the friendship of the first.Everyone has to start with oneself,the protection of the surrounding environment.Olympic atmosphere is diffuse in my home,parents have taken attention from the message of the Olympic Games,all brothers and sisters from time to time to talk about the various stories related to the Olympic Games.
Everyone is on the Olympic Games has its own expectations,and I also believe that China will certainly be able to better organize the Olympic Games and win honor for our country
I am proud of being a Chinese.I hope my country to be much stronger.I look forward to 2008,I will say to the world aloud:Welcome to Beijing.
Let’s bless for the Olympic Games 2008 in Beijing
That's all.Thanks for your listening.

楼主,恕我直言,文章语法错误和用词错误比较多,我本来打算把每个修改的地方再复述下错误原因等,但我发现太多了.我大概谈下主要错误吧
1.句子成分问题,每个句子只能有一个谓语动词,连接2个句子用连词,若并列关系还可以用分号.在句子成分这个方面,楼主问题最多
2.用代词指代everyone, every body的所属格时,用 his or her 或者 his/her ,不能用its
3.先问好,再说ladies and gengtle,习惯问题
4.注意谓语动词单复数形式
5.Olympic Games 不加冠词 the
以下我修改好了的,你自己看吧
Good afternoon,Ladies and Gentlemen!
As we all know, Beijing will hold Olympic Games in 2008, and everybody is eager to look forward to it. Carefully observing the life in detail, we can easily see that the Olympic spirit is pervasive.
Neighbors help each other; colleagues, in spite of competition, are aware that the friendship comes first. Everyone has started to protect his or her surrounding environment. Olympic atmosphere is diffused to my home as well----parents pay great attention to the information of the Olympic Games, and all brothers and sisters take turns to talk about the various stories related to Olympic Games.
Everyone has his or her own expectation about Olympic Games, and I also believe that China will certainly be able to better organize Olympic Games and win honor for our country !
I am proud of being a Chinese. I hope my country to be much stronger. I look forward to 2008, and I will say to the world aloud: Welcome to Beijing.
Good Luck to 2008 Beijing Olympic Games
That's all. Thanks for your listening.