谁可以帮忙我检查英语作文语法

谁可以帮忙我检查英语作文语法
I think play computer games are bad for kids.
Actually,computer games are just a fake world,and on the child’s growth and development were a big serious threat.
First,I think often play on the computer,that for the child’s eye development and bone growth is very bad.When they play on the computer,they would keep a position on long time,for example many children’s myopia because they look at computer screen long times,and humpbacked because they keep a position on long time.
Second,computer games could affect the child’s thinking.A lot of games with violent plot,many children will be to imitate those acts of violence.This make children’s thinking would become violent.
Third,children play on the computer so that the results fall.Many children addicted to online games of the story,they spend a lot of time to play the game.They don’t want get more knowledge from book,every day,they just think how to make they own game becomes more powerful.
Finally,the money.Children did not work,but they need money to Internet cafes to play games and to buy something to make their games become more powerful.They learned to rob and steal,for example in my hometown,some middle school students wanted get money to the Internet,and they killed other people,was later arrested by police
These are my opinion why I think that playing computer games are bad for children.